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September 04, 2005
Internal Reprogramming
I cannot believe this. I am a professional artist. I may not make a living from my work, but I commit myself fully to doing it and I actively seek more opportunities. I have also just spent a shitload of money to get further training in my field.
And yet, as I was working on my Artist Trading Cards, I found myself thinking, "You know, Sal, you've got so many other things to do. You should be doing more important stuff than this."
More important stuff? Like weeding? Laundry? Working out? Painting the bathroom? I'm an artist. Art is important. It's my job.
I've discovered that working on teenytiny pieces like the trading cards gives me the freedom to experiment and try things without worrying about the cost in terms of time or materials. I don't have to plan everything out beforehand to make sure it's perfect. That freedom is creeping into my acting, little by little, which will only make me a better actor, allowing me to truly play and live/work/be in the moment. Helping me escape the need to regiment and perfect things.
So where does that voice come from? And will I ever be able to make it go away? I notice it never says anything when I'm playing video games or surfing the net.
Anyone have any suggestions?
Posted by sally at September 4, 2005 12:38 PM
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