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January 31, 2006
Whether
The Weather Service still says it's "clear and 41 degrees."
Um.
This is the situation in my back yard right now.
There was no snow anywhere in the backyard when I left for rehearsal at ten til six this evening. For the record, those are pretty small, copious little flakes. Not the kind of snow you get when it hovers above freezing.
Also, because the clouds were so cool, a picture I snapped last night. I caught the magic moment. Five minutes later, the sky was scary and grey.
Posted by sally at 10:21 PM
January 29, 2006
Arboretum Project Week Four
I felt blocked today. And tired. I really didn't want to go do this. Not today, my only day off before hell week begins. I'm glad I did, though.
The pictures are pretty grey. They reflect the day. I was shooting between 1 and 3 pm, so it should have been much lighter. It snowed off and on, though not in the way I had requested. Ah well. There's still February.
There are, however, signs of spring everywhere. Buds are swelling and leaves are peeping on trees and shrubs throughout the arboretum. I can't think of a better way to get over the feeling that winter is going to last forever than to take a two hour weekly reality check for and go hunt for evidence of seasonal changes.
As you can tell from today's pictures, I can't keep away from the water. It was the search for running water that took me into the arboretum last year in the first place. I wonder how its reflectivity will change as summer approaches.
Panorama 01-29-06
Burgeoning
Ice Bubble
Culvert
Cherished
Tiny Signs
Country
Berries II
Duckprints
Poplar Draw
Applied Geometry
Reflection
Natural Airbrush
Bamboo Curtain
Ice Cracks
Berries I
Stubborn Maple Seeds
Lower Lake & Boardwalk
Palouse Winter
Posted by sally at 08:56 PM
Welcome to the Year of the Dog
Posted by sally at 10:59 AM
I want so much to be able to get a day's worth of arboretum pix in snow. But it never seems to stay until Sunday, which is my only day with time to do it. It always melts off by Sunday morning. I knew it was supposed to snow this weekend, though. Even though it was really warm, snow was coming. Yesterday, it snowed a bunch, but then it all melted off. By the end of the day, though it was cold, there just wasn't any remaining snow. So last night, I asked for snow. Getting into my car to go to rehearsal. I stopped long enough to make the request aloud. Snow, I begged. Snow. Snow on Saturday night and stay through Sunday. Snow. This is what we woke up to this morning. It's mostly melted away again. For a while, it looked like snowing all day. Now we have blue sky peeping through the clouds. So after rehearsal--tech, with costumes and lights and sound--while walking to my car, I again addressed the sky. Stay, I whispered. Snow, then stay. At least through tomorrow. Here's hoping it works again. And before I go, a question. Am I the only person in the world with "assistant"? This is the situation pretty much every time I sit down to work at my desk: She's moved since I took the picture. Now, she's lying across my right forearm. Makes typing an adventure...
Posted by sally at 03:55 PM
The less time I have for myself, the more I insist on taking it, it turns out. Today, for example. I had a little time between work and rehearsal. So I went home. When I got out of the car, I discovered that David, myself and the vehicles were not the only things making their mark in the driveway. I would feel luckier, I must admit, if I had about 5 degrees more patience. Because I am trying so hard on this show to simplify, to pare it down and really just get to the basics of things. But circumstances are working against me. And tonight I snapped and was very, very rude. I suspect not even taking treats to tech in the morning will help, even when sweetened with an apology...
Posted by sally at 10:31 PM
Here they are. Lots and lots of pix. I took 174 photographs this afternoon and completely ran the camera battery down. I filled the card and had to delete some even to get the last few I wanted. Not to worry, however. I do not have 174 pictures to share with you. Not even a third of that. There are thirty-three in today's collection. The weather was sort of here-and-there, sometimes sunny, sometimes cloudy, but still cold enough that the snow from Thursday and Friday stayed on the ground. So you'll be seeing some interesting lighting effects. Let's begin. Panorama 01-22-06
Posted by sally at 09:33 PM
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... to the Arboretum. Going to take pictures in the cold, grey light of January while Dave screams at the Broncos on television. I'll leave you with a pic I forgot to upload last week. Bunnyflage
Posted by sally at 11:50 AM
I had a realization the other day. It was part of working on Sight Unseen. Near the end of the play, my character has a monologue about a relationship that nearly destroyed her 15 years before. And one of my lines is, "I would have done anything for you, do you know that? Isn't that shameful? A girl so devoid of self?" That line really speaks to something in me, and in working to understand why, I made a discovery. Long, long ago--well, okay, 15 years ago (huh, that's interesting)--I was in an abusive relationship. Not physical, the abuse was never physical, but then, we're never told about the possibilities of emotional abuse, are we? It's not something on which society (at least, this society) chooses to focus. Stories of people ground down by cruel words and unhappy silences and inexplicable coldnesses are not as dramatic on film as those people who are beaten to within inches of their lives and somehow survive to turn on their attackers. Or not. It's funny. I remember thinking at the time that I would have ended it if he hit me. But he never did. it was all verbal jabs and batterings. Hitting someone in the psyche is the one way to hurt them and not leave tattle-tale bruises. Scars, yes, but not any that are visible to the naked eye. Anyway. I spent two, almost three years being ground down to a sensitive, self-loathing nub. And I would have married this man. Almost did. I broke it off and threw him out of the house a month before the wedding. Why? Not because he hit me. Because he never did. No. Because he lied to me. He lied, and I found him out. What he lied about isn't important. I survived it, and besides, I promised him if he made reparations, I wouldn't tell anyone what he had done. The important thing here is that I ended it not because of the way he treated me, but because he lied. I valued honesty above all other things, including myself. My self-esteem has improved since then (I'm sure some people would say I've gone too far the other way), though I've recently discovered that I still have the tendency to be taken by surprise when people emotionally batter me. Probably because I approach people with the assumption that we're all being honest with ourselves and each other right from the beginning. It smarts when I learn they've deceived and hurt me for their own ends. Especially when the hidden agendas are so deeply buried that even the possessors don't recognize them. I still value personal integrity above all other things. For that, I would like to thank my parents, who laid the foundation. And my husband, who is one of the most forthright, honest and upstanding people I know. (Which means I also need to thank his parents, who helped form the person he is.) What one principle is such an important part of your psychological bedrock that you would turn your world upside down to defend it?
Posted by sally at 10:29 AM
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So here I sit, still in my pajamas. I didn't get up until a little more than an hour ago. I had three cats snuggling with me, which was lovely, and to be honest, I'm not sure when I'll get this chance again--to sleep as much as I can--so I decided to sleep myself out. Wonderfulness, except for one bad dream which I'm trying very hard to let go of, as the images were so disturbing that I can't imagine where they came from. I think the sound that was sort of the overriding distressing thing is the worst part of all. It also happens to be the bit that's sticking with me. It and the bloodstains. Right. Maybe it's a hint to go back to my novel and write about some more exploding eyeballs and fire-breathing slimy worms cut in half by satellite dishes. But no. I need to work on lines. Today's not really a full day off. I've five hours of rehearsal this afternoon/evening, followed by a visit to the gym. I wish we could have rehearsals at a normal time instead of 3:30-8:30. There's not really time for a dinner break in there, and though I can go to the gym after, I don't have much opportunity for eating enough to help me get through a workout without bonking. I want my life back. A part-time job with time for gym visits in the afternoon, followed by evening rehearsals. With my free time on weekends available for gardening, rather than being required to catch up on the sleep I'm not getting the rest of the time. Okay. Big sigh. Rolling of shoulders, stretching of neck, wriggling of spine. I think I'm through bitching now. I think. I just want time to get back to my novel and my photography and the other art I've been doing and a job I can leave when I leave it, if you know what I mean, rather than having it follow me around in my head when I'm supposed to be not working. Well. At this point, I'm living for February 27. And then, maybe, a nice big Spring Break vacation. (Going to Shoshone, perhaps, to visit my friend Karma and work on a one-woman play with her. Or to the beach...)
Posted by sally at 11:06 AM
The sun was shining for much of my jaunt. I must admit, it's awfully hard to take good pictures when you have to pee... I have decided that each week's pix will begin with a panorama of the entire arboretum from the top, looking roughly south. Panorama 1-15-2006
Posted by sally at 02:54 PM
Now, while the sun's still out and before it starts snowing... Spent a great big chunk of yesterday helping a friend re-build his destroyed trailer. He and his family went home over Christmas. While they were gone, their pipes froze and burst and ran for about 5 days. The trailer has since been gutted and is being completely rebuilt. I mudded and sanded the drywall while Dave put together the kitchen cupboards. I wish I could have done more, but the place just wasn't ready for painting, which is my particular specialty. Pictures of the Arboretum to be posted soon (but I have to go take them first). Meanwhile, here's something to keep your eyes active. Can you believe how long he is?
Posted by sally at 10:37 AM
Last year, just before I blew out my knee, I decided I wanted to do a year-long photo essay on the University of Idaho's Arboretum. I had just discovered it, and I wanted to share it with the world. Then a falling actor took out my ACL and that was that for the hiking stuff. However. I'm back in the swing of things now, and since the new year is only one week old, I figured I'd get started on my picture taking. I meant to do this last Sunday, starting the new year off right, but I forgot. Today, I barely remembered before it got dark. Still, I'm going to try to do this every Sunday for the next fifty-one. New Year - One Week Old More next week, provided I remember.
Posted by sally at 05:45 PM
Why can I not have a happy medium? Why must I either have nothing at all to do in my life, long, long, empty days stretching slowly and horribly into an empty, grey future, or so much to do that I spend all day with my brain spinning, whizzzz, whizzzz, whizzz? Why can't I have a busy, fulfilling purposeful life with time for myself to meditate and garden and do the damn laundry? I am currently in a get up, work, eat, rehearse, eat, rehearse, eat, sleep, repeat phase. I hate that shit. I need to get to the gym, and there is just not time. I need to have some moments to just be, to unwind and slow down, and I'm not getting those either. Yes, I can see a light at the end of the tunnel,; we're 1/4 of the way through the rehearsal process for Sight Unseen, and the schedule will change next week when classes start again. Yes, my work at the International Jazz Collections is building to one wild, sleepless week and then a couple of weeks to wind down before I'm once again jobless. But in the meantime, I'm crazybusy, and I don't like to live this way. I'm not sure when I'm going to have time to run my lines to learn them because I'm always either at work or in rehearsal. Today, for instance, I got up and had a big breakfast because I knew it was going to be crazy. Then I went to work. On a Saturday. For about an hour and 45 minutes because I didn't have time yesterday to get everything done that needed doing before I had to rush to rehearsal. And as it was I was about 15 minutes late. (Yes, I'm a good actor. I called the director to let her know when I realized it was going to happen.) So anyway, I went to work for almost two hours this morning. Then I went to rehearsal for three hours. Now I have an hour off for lunch and then I have to go back for another three hours of rehearsal. And then I can take time to breathe for the first time in seven days. This is not how I like to live my life. I hate everything being so urgent all the time.
Posted by sally at 02:19 PM
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I haven't vomited in 36 hours. Life is good.
Posted by sally at 09:49 AM
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©2006 - All content copyright Sally Eames-Harlan unless otherwise noted
Needled
Ripples
Weeping Willow
PussyWillow
Lower Stream
Red Oak Leaf
Paperbark IV
Lower Lake Vertical
Reflecting Willows
Willow's Lap
Willow Bud
Lower Lake Panorama
QuailPrints II
Self-Portrait
Xin Nian Kuai Le
January 28, 2006
Be Careful What You Wish For
January 27, 2006
Smelling the Roses (figuratively speaking)
The robins also felt a walk in the snow to be a necessary thing. Lucky, lucky us. January 22, 2006
Arboretum Project Week 3
January Fireworks
Quiet Spot
Above and Below
Good Buds
Restless Reflections
Mini Panorama
Old Man's Beard
One Man's Treasure...
(It's a junkyard, clearly visible from the bottom of the draw in which the arboretum sits. In spite of that, it's a lovely view.)
Wintry
Heather
Watertumble
Well-Watered
Back the Way We Came
The Barn at the Bottom
Sumac Branch
Watertumble III
Magnolia Bud
Lower Lake
Scots Heather
Knothole
Rosehips and Winter Wheat
Greenery
Branch Collar
Watertumble II
Winterflower I
Winterflower II
Winterflower III
Twisty Turny Path
Reflecting
Sagebrush & Lichen
Species Rosa
Snow and Still Water
On My Way...
January 21, 2006
Knowing Oneself
January 16, 2006
3-Day Weekend
January 15, 2006
The Arboretum Project - Week 2
Ophelia's Willow
January Clematis
Blue and Yellow
Leaves under Glass
Clouds and Cattails
Grass Plume
Blue Sky and Berries
Island Dreams of Spring
Seeing Red
Another Birds' Nest
Rocks and Rivulet
Winter Willows
Reflective Bench
Narcissus Berries
Windblown Plume
Winter Red
Waxwings on the Wing
Off to Take Pictures
January 08, 2006
Arboretum Photographs
Moon and Crabapple
First Lake
Winter Waterfall
Ducks
Abandoned Bird's Nest
Rose Hip Picture Frame
Winter Water
Bunny
Startled Quail
Living Tree-Topper
Upper Lake at Dusk
January 07, 2006
Feast or Famine
January 01, 2006
Happy New Year!